Summer Pastiche (Duffy/Cosi)

I couldn’t decide which one I wanted to do, so I decided to choose two with very opposing tones.

Cosi part:

Diana: The isolation and nervousness of going outside made me want to fling myself out the window- but then I realised that i’m not a bird, and sighed and went back to counting sheep instead. Lucky for you, I was just bored out of my mind. Fun right?

Diana: I tell you, it felt like I was choking in my room. If you like that, then you probably have a weird sexual fantasy. But when I sulk or look out the window for half the day doing absolutely nothing, I’m probably thinking of burning the bathroom stall. Funny surprise for me parents.

Diana: I’d sing and dance on the balcony, but then my folks would wake up and call me a screaming banshee. Maybe for good reason, it was 4 in the morning.

You: No wonder they yelled, I would too if you were wakin’ everyone up!

Diana: Hey, I was bored alright? You can’t judge me like that after what you’ve done.

You: …

*Diana tries to stand up from her chair but falls over. She doesn’t get up*

Diana: Of course. You know? I love the floor, the floor can have me. If it were lava, I would hug it tight. What do I even need legs for if I keep falling all the time. Ooh, i’ve got a good joke.

You: What?

Diana: Why did the doctor laugh at the bone? A beat. Because it was humerus.

*Silence*

You: I wish you did fling yourself out the window.

Diana: Now that’s just rude.

You: That’s rich, coming from you.

Diana: Well, what did you do then?

You: Met with friends, ate out, cycled to S-

Diana: Boring!

You: Says the one who stayed home all the time.

Diana: Thinking about life is more interesting than what you’ve been doing.

You: That is completely false.

Diana: It really isn’t because life is seen as previous by almost everybody around us, most likely you too. I see it more as a rough and rugged path that inevitably leads to death, therefor it doesn’t really matter. However, i’ve been pondering in the small time that we do have when we’re alive, what to do with it? What do achievements, love, friends and family mean if you’re brain dead inside a coffin, or turned to ash? What’s after that then? Heaven? Hell? Reincarnation? Nothingness? Exams? It’s all too much for me, my brain can’t handle that.

You: Has this gone on for the entire summer?

Diana: What has gone on?

You: This.

Diana: This what?

You: This death talk.

Diana: Death talk? I think you mean the death star.

You: No! This whole talk that you’ve been going on about for the past couple of minutes.

Diana: Oh that. Yes, the whole summer.

You: Oh dear. No wonder you’re in here.

Diana: Yup.

Duffy part:

Hopping around malls never appealed to me.

The crowds pouring in like ants,

the only consolation was the itching of my thumb.

I was etching into it like a carpenter with his woodwork.

The sudden dispersing  of people was apocalyptic but calming.

The mask hiding my frowning,

‘Twas comforting.

Distancing yourself was music to my ears,

When I first heard of it.

I can be normal,

It it means to stop cowering.

But once this is all over,

I can’t think.

There’s blood under my fingernail.