IFP Timor Lester 2018 was one of the most unique experiences of my life. The conference allowed me to put myself in ways I never had before and discover traits about myself that I never thought I had. Coming into the conference, I had no idea what to expect. We had some basic information but no real insight into how the conference would be for us. Although the whole conference went smoothly and was executed extremely well, there were certain moments that were extremely memorable and stuck to me.

The day the delegates arrived, it was a flurry of excitement of nervousness amongst the facilitators. On one hand, we didn’t know what to expect but at the same time we were looking forward to what was to come. Slowly the delegates began to arrive and I made the effort to ask each and every one of their names. We took them all into the main hall and started with icebreakers to get to know each other and get people to be comfortable with each other. This was slightly overwhelming for me as there were 40 of them and it took a lot from me to open myself up and get to know them. As the day went on we moved into personal identity. There was one activity that stood out immensely. Delegates were asked to write speeches about something or someone that they were passionate about to deliver in small groups and then- if comfortable- deliver to the whole group. As I walked around to observe, I noticed that everyone was writing about different things. Some so simple yet so broad and effective to deliver a short speech on. For example, someone spoke about acceptance, someone about travelling and some about peace in general. Each speech was unique in itself. Towards the end when people were delivering their speeches to the whole group, there was one speech that really moved me. One of the delegates came up and delivered her speech in Tetum as she was more comfortable. Although I couldn’t understand the speech she was delivering, it seemed to move each and every one of the delegates in the room. Throughout the speech, delegates were snapping, cheering and smiling. Adriana’s passion was clear throughout the speech as she used elaborate gestures and the tone of her voice conveyed her true passion. Just the tone of her voice and the reaction to it made me wish I knew Tetum so I could be a part of the special moment. When her speech ended, there was a roar of applause and the proud look on her face made me realise how important this conference was to her and all her peers and also made me remember why I was a part of this.

The next day was community day. Throughout the day delegates engaged in activities that made them understand communities in general and communities that they were a part of in Timor and analyse them and the aspects of these communities. One of the most powerful activities that day was the “community web”. Delegates split up into groups representing an issue in their community that they were passionate about and discussed the issue and the stakeholders involved. Then each group was given a ball of string and were asked to assign themselves a stakeholder and speak about how the issue affected them. I was part of the “Teenage pregnancy” group. The stakeholders included, the teenagers, the parents, the child, siblings of the teenagers, teachers and organisations that help teenagers in this position. Throughout the process, each person would say their perspective and pass it on to another stakeholder who would like to comment further. By the end, we had created a web that was so intricately intertwined it was hard to follow. The exercise helped delegates understand how complicated issues can be and that many stakeholders have to be considered when looking for a solution.

The next day was conflict day, the day that I was one of the lead facilitators. The first activity was the scatter activity led by me. Unfortunately, while leading the activity I realised I was confusing the delegates. This began to stress me out as I saw it as the day going off to a bad start. On top pf that some of my co- lead facilitators, began to talk over me and take over the activity that I was supposed to be leading. This added to my frustration as I saw it as unfair that they were controlling the activity that I had planned out. As the activity went on, I saw that the delegates were beginning to understand the activity more so I decided to drag it on for a little longer so they would have a more solid understanding. Flexibility was extremely important this day as many things changed as the day went on and we had to accommodate them to have a smooth-running conference.

This day there was also a lack of participation from some of the facilitators. During some activities where the delegates were speaking in Tetum, some delegates thought that it was no use for them to be a part of the activity since they couldn’t understand what was occurring. But they didn’t realise that no matter what was going on it was important to be there even if not actively playing a role in the discussions. This occurred during the Kay and Jah activity where some facilitators were absent as the delegates were conversing in Tetum. But the facilitators who were present were getting translations form delegates which allowed us to be a part of the activity so facilitators were not completely useless. It was important going forward that all of the facilitators understood how important their role was even if they didn’t understand what was going on as the delegates did rely on us.

This day was also the day that I realised that I was not interacting enough with the delegates. During dinner, I noticed some of my friends sitting with a large group of delegates and they seemed to be having an amazing time. At this point I was sitting clustered with a group of facilitators on another table. I realised that I hadn’t put enough effort into interacting with the delegates and although it was halfway through the conference I wanted to change that. From then on I made the conscious effort to talk to the delegates more, learn more about them, share things about myself. I made so many more friendships and I realised the fun-loving people that they were. I got to know them on a personal level and we had many jokes amongst ourselves and I really felt like a part of a community around them.

The last day was also one of the days that made the biggest impact on me. The acknowledgement circle was an activity led by the change making team. All of us sat in a circle with a few people in the middle. The lead facilitator would call out a statement like “tap someone who inspired you” or “tap someone who made you smile” and the people inside the circle had to tap one person (or more) that made them feel that way. During this activity feeling tapped was the best feeling in the world. As a facilitator, it made me realise the impact I had really made on these people and made me feel important in their lives. Some of the delegates began crying as they felt so thankful and pleased that they had impacted people’s lives. The activity on the whole was very wholesome and a nice way to end the conference.

Before the closing ceremony as the delegates packed, they were handing out souvenirs- like scarves, bracelets etc.-  to their favourite facilitators. Before this happened, I was so worried that I wouldn’t receive any as I only began bonding with the delegates in the past couple of days and didn’t feel like they knew me enough to gift me anything. But I was pleasantly surprised as I got 3 scarves and a bracelet from various delegates. Some were delegates that I hadn’t spoken to a lot and it made me realise that even though it was a short time, we had made some really solid bonds with the youth.

The experience of IFP was a very humbling one that I will cherish for the rest of my life. The bonds I made and the people I met were incredible and they made as much of an impact of my life as I did on theirs.