I think I did try and pay more attention to my word choice in explaining the techniques that I was using. My sentences were also well organised, and gave a point, evidence etc. However, overall this writing could definitely be improved. My analysis was still not very deep as I did not truly understand the purpose of the passage. For next time, I will take more time to read the extract properly and consider the purpose before writing. Another thing I will consider is trying to focus on a range of different techniques, less emphasis on sentence structure and more on macroanalysis.
My aim for next time is to consider the purpose of the extract before writing so that I knew how I could phrase my topic sentences and themes. Another thing would be to try and consider the macro idea before considering specific micro techniques and don’t overly consider a single technique. I would also try and consider the context in which the writing is created, and focus more on the writer than the reader (especially because it is an autobiography.)