Category: English Learner Portfolio

#Slavery – https://drive.google.com/file/d/1j0Ess1sjFg-AoRxjsmxVxbe9WXOyz255/view 

# Calvin and Hobbes -https://drive.google.com/file/d/1z_HjZ_wWZxPa4RlsVZZ2Bz7RihdZj3m_/view

link to slide –> https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/1U-E-LkYqwxB-UNPe7RIDIC8btYSo2JJtgjDULzguVGA/edit#slide=id.gc72711c49b_0_20

 

1.How might you use the PEA structure more effectively to avoid describing/narrating ? 

• understand the text clearly before starting to analyse.
• be concise on stating “Point” – “Evidence” and then “Analyse”.
• When analysing, remember to answer “to what effect?” – meaning how can you show analysis more and further in depth? to what you have already analysed a bit. What is the effect of having eg: high angle? why does it make them look powerful?
• Answer “so what?”
• Do not state or use points and evidence that does not provide more analysis – that will eventually go into description.

 

2. How might you use your thesis to organise your ideas to BUILD arguments? 

• unpack and analyse in the form of:

Visual elements

Structural

Lexical elements

Theme.

• Make sure to be able to identity 1 or 2 themes when reading and understanding the text.
• Identify 2 or 3  thesis strands that supports the main themes and then use PEA.
• Build your analysis by developing your points and ideas.

 

3. How might you read more carefully for implied meaning by using visual or verbal word choices? 

• read the text 2 to 3 times to understand the text while also unpacking the visual and lexical elements.
• for comic strips – read texts beyond class
• focus on the choices of word used in the text – analyse “why did they use that?” “how does that impact the understanding of the text?”
• looking into character vs characterisation
• if there is a character shown in the text, then there should be something that the characters represent or symbolise.
• find out what do the characters represent or symbolise? –> what is contrasting, ironic, humorous, exaggerating? within the characters and their actions or thoughts?
• Do the representation of characters have any impact on society? on the readers?

 

Next step

• Read essays written by others – to see what necessary changes i might need to make
•  practise more comic strip and political text type paper 1 – with the feedbacks implied
• study the different text types, possible features and vocabularies of those text types that I can use in my essay.
• learn how to unpack visual and lexical elements more.
• Look into the work choice used by the author and its impact on the readers?
• improving PEA structure. –> To avoid narrating.

Text 2

 

Text 1

 

 

 

With lot of practises and preparation with my classmates, I felt confident about doing my IO. However, since I came back home and could not go back to Singapore, I decided to do my IO remotely. Thinking about doing IO online was one of the biggest challenges I faced during the online learning period. Firstly, I was worried since it was my first time and secondly, I worried about technical difficulties which could occur anytime during the timed session. Nevertheless, everything was well organised from the school side and I made sure to keep myself connected to stronger internet connection without any distractions. This made my 15 minutes of IO very smooth without any problems.

Completing my IO was one of the biggest achievements during the stressful remote learning and at the same time, I have learnt a lot during two months of preparation put into my work. I have learnt not only how to compare different types of texts but also how to deeply unpack and analyse the text while also making intertextuality of the contexts. This has helped me to get ideas for my HL essay and in real life applications.

I began to plan my IO ideas and which relevant texts I can choose as soon as possible so that I can start planning and even if i needed to change any of the texts, then I would still have more time to prepare. I organised all of my notes for all the literature and non-literature texts that we covered in class in a padlet to make it easier for myself to choice pairs.

Padlet link –   https://padlet.com/yangd1034881/zwctmku0pwb8

 

At first, I chose to do Women’s world and one of the adverts we studied in the class but I could not find one that I felt more comfortable to talk about and match the ideas with Women’s world. Therefore, after talking with my teacher, I picked the pages from Women’s world where it talked about the loss of identity of Roy and I tried to match with one of the photos of Dorothea Lange that I felt confident with.

I decided to choose:

• Women’s world by Graham Rawle – page 264 as literature text
• Photographs by Dorothea lange – “White Angle breadline San Francisco 1993.  – Non-literature

 

.

“White Angle breadline San Francisco 1993.

 

1. How might you identity the text type more effectively and discuss text type conventions? 

• Understand the text clearly first and do pre-study of different text types for easy identification of the text during the test.

 

2. How might you provide more evidence and unpack theme to support your thesis? 

• Look more into visual and lexical elements and connect them to the main theme of the text
• Refer to the purpose of the visual and lexical elements
• Look into the tone and registration. 
• Analysing “so what?” after stating evidence
• Unpack Language 
• Answer the guiding question directly

 

3. How might you unpack the use of visual elements and their interactions with lexical elements?

• By looking into frame compositions, angle, camera shots, layouts, Rule of thirds 
• How visual elements interacts with the lexical elements
• looking into what the image present or symbolise –> “humorous?” “satire?”

 

Reminder

–> stick with PEE

–> Prepare beforehand –> know the conventions, styles and structures of different text types.

 

https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/1U-E-LkYqwxB-UNPe7RIDIC8btYSo2JJtgjDULzguVGA/edit#slide=id.gbbe11f4658_0_189 –> feedback slide 

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1h9d2afNdIy8C6iPi3A7jZaVG0wO0Ejrv/view –> Screencast feedback 

 

The Journey of Lifetime – Text 2

 

How might you edit your work to maintain precise vocabulary, spelling, grammar?

• Study the use of literary devices and alternative vocabulary from the resources on the OLP 
• careful on writing choice of vocabularies and grammar . –> not making simple mistakes

How might you identify ideas/themes being developed and create a clear thesis centered on theme?

• Read the text – understand- identify what the author is trying to tell the readers (bigger theme) – then connect with one of the 7 concepts or Global issues- come up with thesis strands. 

How might you unpack the text type conventions of the core story/ articles to help connect them to ideas/theme? 

• By looking into how the text type (eg: article) features affect the story of the author. 
• Eg: looking into (knowledge from news, media, bias) and how does that affect the intended audience

How might you avoid simply providing a summary of the article and create insightful analysis? 

• PEE
• commenting more on the diction, style or tone, noticing for example the use of personification or anthropomorphism, of sensationalism, hyperbole, humour

 

Connecting bigger ideas using any one 7 concepts or use of any one global issues 

 

Criterion B

• • Close analysis is missing – got the same score last time 
  • Establishing a theme that the thesis statements connect to 
  • Having a concluding statement after every paragraph.  
  • Unpack – more evidence – Visual (heading placement, layout, etc) and Lexical elements 

• How do visual and lexical elements connect to create themes or provide ideas? 

• How does authorial choice shape meaning? 

Criterion D

• Work on sentence structure.
• Use of precise terminologies and literary devices. 

My goal 

• Working on unpacking and analysis – through analysing/ pre-studying the 7 concepts and also the global issues. So that I can center around my main ideas around them. 
• Use of correct and appropriate vocabulary related to paper 1
• Time management
• Practising reading more other texts to get to use to reading pace in exam – you spent too much time re-reading the text last time 
• Staying focused on the main theme – Criterion C → Organise thesis in order of priority. 
• Unpacking visual and lexical elements 

Diction – the choice and use of words and phrases in speech or writing.

How might you provide a clear thesis statement connected to themes, a clearly related topic sentence, and a building of ideas? 

• one of the key point missing in my essay was establishment of one main thematic idea where my all thesis strands point out to. Also providing a concluding statement that links to my theme/idea while also making sure that it connects to my next idea in the next paragraph.

 

How might you avoid simple description/summary?

• Use and stick to Point, Evidence, Analysis to avoid description.
• Do not provide statement without providing any evidence and evaluation.

 

How might you avoid making historical or cultural comments and assumptions? – reference to a main theme/idea?

• By providing more evidence and evaluating the points by focusing on the main thematic idea.
• Backup assumptions with evidence to unpack and make statement stronger.
• Unpacking evidence and analysing rather than making assumptions with weak points.

 

I will be mainly using the feedback I got from my teacher for the first draft to improve my final essay. Applying all the discussions and changes that I needed to make for thesis strands and thematic ideas will be put into the final essay for better written work.

 

 

Main things I need to work on:

1. work on introduction properly. – follow the feedback
2. use of literary technique?
3. how can you stay organised with the structure?
4. point out specific thesis strands in the beginning of the paragraph
5. backup all thesis strands using PEA
6. avoid making assumptions and historical comments – not too much
7. need a concluding statement after every paragraph that connects to the idea/theme and also connecting to the idea that  you are going to talk about in the next paragraph.
8. need an overall one “Theme” that your essay is focusing on.
9. need to show how “so what” – how does this portrayal of women connect to a theme? without this, becomes description/summary

outline link

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1R-WB8NXPVw18d8-3UiRwVdQ9b13vwAhcEGeXXS7BdUM/edit

In the beginning of my essay planning, my initial topic sentences were to focus on how in different ways women in the novel were represented by the author and how it connects with the Japanese society historically and even now.

My previous topic sentences and ideas were;

• Topic sentence 1 – how are female characters represented ? (strong, powerful, weak, moving towards modernisation, holding on to culture etc)
• Topic sentence 2 – Predominant male character representation (Kikuji) – how does he think and act with different female characters in the novel with different intension and traditional values.
• Topic sentence 3- Weak women are more subordinate.

My topic sentences were not very focused and I found my ideas floating all around. When I did research and tried to find evidences to support my statements from the text, there was very less of them and I found myself researching and looking into the ideas of how women were simply presented in the book which were clearly visible to the readers as well and thus I felt my topic sentences did not make my arguments stronger.

However, after talking with my friends and teacher, I came to focus my topic sentences. While my main thesis idea is still the same as how women are represented in the novel but I would be focusing on only the idea about the different levels of subordinate women representation by the author and their insights.

Initial Topic Sentence:

1. Representation of woman as less subordinate. (Chikako)
2. Representation of woman as very subordinate (Mrs.Ota)
3. Representation of woman who could fall under being a subordinate but one that pushes the factors affecting her to be submissive away (Fumiko)

With this initial topic sentences, I can focus my idea on one concept and at the same time refer my evidences from the whole body of book (Thousand Cranes).

1. How might you use precise terminology to unpack the text more effectively? 

• Note down the specific terminologies that I think are relevant to the text while stating evidence for that during the planning time since I forget to use them when I am nervous at the beginning of writing.
• Practise use of terminologies before tests to get used to it and on how to use/apply them.

1. How might you unpack the verbal and visual elements of the text to derive more plausible arguments and clearer insights?

• Use Point, Evidence and Evaluation 
• identify carefully what kind of text/prompt it is in order to use specific and relevant visual and lexical elements.
• Study the role played by male/female characters in the text.
• You put yourself in the audience’s shoe and imagine what it could mean to you.
• how are different gender identity represented in the text? why? how?

Visual elements;

• Rule of thirds – break and analyse- supported by evidence 
• Angel, shot and framing composition 
• Colour contrast 
• Use of characters – male vs female – if relevant connecting to resistant reading 
• Placement/ representation of social classes 

Verbal or lexical elements

• Fonts – size 
• Punctuation 
• Repetition of phrases 
•  Headline 
• Power dynamics 
• Ethos? Pathos? Logos? → Identify them and show why?how?

 

–> I began my English language and literature HL essay planning earlier and quickly in order to get more ideas and do more research on it. My first idea was on writing the essay based on the significance of preserving  tea ceremony as part of Japanese culture and tradition and the consequences of not respecting it as I thought it was one of the open and main motif of the novel. However, as I started researching and reading more hidden messages in the novel, I found how the author represented woman’s role in the novel quite interesting and fun. After getting this idea, I was able to research on how Japan has always put heavy responsibilities on preserving their culture since the first world war and restrictions for women in the society which helped me to connect my idea from the novel to how women should/must be represented in the society. Additionally, watching the class video on “Deciphering Japan” by journalist Yumi Araki on “Japanese Identity” and “the role of women” helped me to focus my idea on my line of inquiry “How does Kawabata Yasunari represent women in Thousand Cranes?” 

 

 

 

Link to English IO planning padlet.

https://padlet.com/yangd1034881/zwctmku0pwb8