Video 1: touch video pass
Video 2: touch video dive
In touch rugby I woke up before school to practice rugby with my team, practicing drills, passing, and if it rained recently we’d practice diving. Diving is really scary to me because that’s how most injuries in touch happen slamming your body into the grass at top speed is just begging for scrapes to happen. I started touch in Grade 5, but even now I’m still afraid of it. When I was younger I’d play touch as a wing because I didn’t know the rules as well but could run, but now I’m older and can’t run as fast but I’m strong and know the rules so I’m a middle and push the team forward into action. Since I’m a middle i don’t score points in touch as much, I even go out of my way to pass to others when there’s an opportunity out of fear because it’s scary to run forward at people and have them shove and grab at you. I’m fine with it when just pushing forward down the field but at the touchline it’s too unpredictable for what can happen so it’s quite scary to me. But I have learned to rely on my team members as we work together as a team to overcome this, as I can pass the ball to others and we can work to score a try together.
Going to touch itself is even anxiety inducing for me because I find it really nerve wracking to go to situations I don’t have as much experience with and to go to a group of people who are 1-2 years younger than me and do sports with them early in the morning is scary. Because oh god what if I got the time wrong, what if it’s not today, what if I forget something, and what if everyone hates me. So yeah touch is terrifying to me socially. Touch rugby is just a very scary concept to me. It wasn’t as scary when I was younger but now I’m older and I’m just grasping to memories of when I was in middle school and it wasn’t so scary. I tried to overcome my anxiety about this kind of thing by joining the softball team when the touch season ended but I was too anxious to even make it onto the field even when texting people for support with it. New experiences are just so scary they make me cry and thats how it is for me. Every time I step out of my comfort zone I get a little better, and even if I can’t go to softball this year, going to touch was a step forward for me. I can hopefully apply this so I can apply for some sports in uni because otherwise I’ll be too anxious to show up to any practices. I’m just always alone in these activities with no friends so its very isolating and scary to me. Yeah anxiety isn’t fun.
