It is extremely clear that Wilde must have been an interesting person. He was a popular dinner guest before his fame, a self-proclaimed genius and definitely would have stood out from normal people at the time. He was uncompromising in his identity and relationships since even when he was threatened with arrest he refused to run away. Judging by what I know of his literary work he enjoyed and valued wit. His values especially within his choices in relationships would have heavily clashed with society at the time as well as other aspects of his personality. This might be shown in his work through the relationships he chooses to portray for example in The Picture of Dorian Gray. His feelings regarding etiquette could perhaps also be inferred from his works as the Importance of Being Earnest begins with both main characters having over the top ways to get out of social engagements as maybe drastic methods to get out of this sort of thing without seeming rude at the time. His satire for society probably has multiple reasons. In my opinion, these were probably to make a mockery of a society that did not accept him and a mockery of the parts that he followed for example his fashion choices and dinner parties that would presumably be full of etiquette related rules. However, I am not sure of the extent to which he was a member of high society but from what I know I think he would have potentially mocked himself a little.
Other people writings:
I think that to Wilde, anything beautiful held importance. A true aesthete, his devotion to writing and the arts seem to be sufficient evidence of it. His extravagant spendings on fashion and clothing, as well as decorating his house in London even while going into debt, reveals his fixation on beauty. There is also a sense of arrogance and pride he holds for being a unique, educated, intelligent and sophisticated individual, which once again reflects his values and outlook in life. -Henah Kwak
I think the seeds for satirical representation of high society began during his time at Oxford and much more after returning from the United States (after he’s got more money). With the money to experience the upper class, he could see what wealth can buy and meet the people that attain it. I believe he intentionally mocks the high-class individuals, but Wilde has assumed that he is and will never be associated with them. Perhaps it’s a reminder to be humble or to stay self-aware of being pretentious. But by these satirical jokes in his works, he points out and ridicules (innocently) the “untouchable” in the Victorian era, something that was unheard of or not written about before.- Ruby Psillides
Wilde never attempted to fit the mould – indeed, he was verifiably convinced of his own genius – See “The only thing I have to declare is my genius”. His exuberant personality and flamboyant nature provided a direct contrast to Victorian ideals. Men were expected to be courteous and attentive husbands and the breadwinners of their families. Wilde did not appear to care for these restraints, and his homosexuality, which was then severely looked down upon, meant that he did not confer to these norms.
Wilde never attempted to fit the mould – indeed, he was verifiably convinced of his own genius – See “The only thing I have to declare is my genius”. His exuberant personality and flamboyant nature provided a direct contrast to Victorian ideals. Men were expected to be courteous and attentive husbands and the breadwinners of their families. Wilde did not appear to care for these restraints, and his homosexuality, which was then severely looked down upon, meant that he did not confer to these norms.
His plays were scathing commentaries on the highfalutin cultural norms and expectations that were so prominent then. In some respect, he might also be mocking himself in his satirical representation of high society. They were materialistic and put on a carefully curated presentation of themselves. This was not far from the constructed front he put on himself, hiding his homosexuality and instead conferring to what was expected of him by society by staying with his wife until her death.- Tanisha Patil