Lately in PSE we have been looking at Emotional Intelligence, the ability to understand human emotions.
I am not sure what to think about this or what my strengths and weaknesses are, as I do not have nor want many close relationships with others and I do not care much about people beyond my immediate circle on an individual level. In this way, I lack the trait of curiosity about other people. It makes sense that this an EI trait, because even if you had the capability to, you wouldn’t understand others if you don’t care enough about their feelings to analyse them. However, I am increasingly learning that good collaboration is useful in service (analogous to work) and academic settings in ensuring efficiency but also just a good atmosphere. Perhaps I can try to internalise this and try to see individuals as unique people with their own aims in and outside that setting rather than blocks that I deal with.
However, I believe I have some strengths in terms of internal EI, or intelligence about my own emotions. I notice that, compared to my friend, I am pretty good at saying No to things or setting up boundaries. I am self-disciplined about putting my emotional and mental wellbeing above external responsibilities. I also am trying to make sure I get 8 hours of sleep a night, because I know that it helps me have decent energy and mental sharpness during the day. Apparently this observation requires some emotional intelligence. I also feel like I am good at not letting others take away my joy for the most part. Like I said previously, I am pretty self-centred, so this comes naturally to me. I craft my own goals with myself in mind, and even if others disagree I do not care because it does not concern them. They are simply wasting their time by not focusing on their own goals, after all. I also do not drink coffee or alcohol which compromise rational thinking.
I find that sometimes I feel I cannot control my emotions, or I do not understand why I am sad. After all, I tell myself, all my basic needs are met and noone else’s opinion should matter. Maybe getting a bigger emotional vocabulary will help.
My goals would be to have a better understanding of how understanding and engage with others can help me feel happy or get what I want, to be more grateful for what I have, and be better able to identify and name my emotions.