Dear Linda,

I understand that this situation is very controversial and that we perceive the custody of May Ling very differently. I acknowledge your strong desire to raise a child by adoption. Without doubt I know that you can take good care of an adopted child.

But I cannot bring myself to understand how a child can be deprived of its biological mother, when she is willing to give back what she couldn’t before. I know what you think- how could a parent leave her child in the cold like that? Abandonment is not easy. Why would I do such thing voluntarily? It is easy for you to say. You have all the resources and needs at the tip of your fingers. For you it does not take much to acquire the fundamental needs to raise a child. For everybody in Shaker, it seems so easy. But when you step out of the utopian life, do you come to realise the harsh reality that most other parents are facing?

Parenting is challenging. But that does not mean I shall stop trying. That does not mean I will give up my right to have my child back. You think a mother who abandoned her child does not deserve a second chance. Now, I am more stable. I am ready to redeem myself to May Ling. I was always loving and caring for her but this time, I will show her. I will give to her. For every mother is different. You think that the only means of giving affection is by feeding her the nutritive baby formula and giving her all the toys she can have. You think that money resolves all the issues, and makes things easier, better. But my ways are different. My ways are real, they are sentimental. I can offer my baby my whole heart and dedication. I have worked towards it all this time. Can you possibly imagine what I am going through? Seeing my own child in the hands of a rich, insensitive family who does nothing but spoil my baby with such unnecessary needs, and raise her the typical American way.

How is she to learn about her culture? About her true self? As if hanging asian art in your house is a solution. But being ‘sensitive’ to culture is so much more than that. May Ling has culture. She is different. And growing up in your household, she will be deprived of it. Years later, she will look at her self in the mirror in astonishment and bewilderment, she will forever wonder the roots that led her to her skin colour, eye shape, facial features. But culture brings much more than that. It forms your identity. Your perception of the world. And that, only her true family can bring. You can educate her all you want but it is me, deep inside that can raise her to bring out the best, and truest version of her self.

You must consider my situation. How I feel. I was in desperation. But now I am in need. You dwell on my mistake of abandoning May Ling but you fail to understand the reasoning for it. You refuse to step out of your dream life and acknowledge the harsh reality I face. The trouble I have been through. I need understanding for the least. You are stubborn and you keep refusing. This shows the lack of respect you have.

I need justice. I will keep fighting for my right to win back my child. Do not think for an instant that you can keep my May Ling away from me so easily.

– Bebe.