HL Essay Reflection #2

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In the beginning of my essay planning, my initial topic sentences were to focus on how in different ways women in the novel were represented by the author and how it connects with the Japanese society historically and even now.

My previous topic sentences and ideas were;

  • Topic sentence 1 – how are female characters represented ? (strong, powerful, weak, moving towards modernisation, holding on to culture etc)
  • Topic sentence 2 – Predominant male character representation (Kikuji) – how does he think and act with different female characters in the novel with different intension and traditional values.
  • Topic sentence 3- Weak women are more subordinate.

My topic sentences were not very focused and I found my ideas floating all around. When I did research and tried to find evidences to support my statements from the text, there was very less of them and I found myself researching and looking into the ideas of how women were simply presented in the book which were clearly visible to the readers as well and thus I felt my topic sentences did not make my arguments stronger.

However, after talking with my friends and teacher, I came to focus my topic sentences. While my main thesis idea is still the same as how women are represented in the novel but I would be focusing on only the idea about the different levels of subordinate women representation by the author and their insights.

Initial Topic Sentence:

  1. Representation of woman as less subordinate. (Chikako)
  2. Representation of woman as very subordinate (Mrs.Ota)
  3. Representation of woman who could fall under being a subordinate but one that pushes the factors affecting her to be submissive away (Fumiko)

With this initial topic sentences, I can focus my idea on one concept and at the same time refer my evidences from the whole body of book (Thousand Cranes).